Before their divorce, there were two (more) crises.
The first crisis was caused by Yulhee. Her frequent runaways and sleep patterns became an issue. According to Choi Minhwan, Yulhee was not a devoted mother. She often goes out at night and sleeps during the day.
In August 2021, Choi Minhwan even informed his agency manager of his intention to get divorced. However, the situation didn't escalate to that point as he chose to understand Yulhee.
The second reason for the divorce was Choi Minhwan himself. Yulhee found out about Choi Minhwan's visits to adult entertainment establishments in the second half of 2022. Yulhee was deeply hurt, and Choi Minhwan sought her forgiveness. They reconciled afterward.
The third conflict was caused by Yulhee again. Her frequent napping and running away from home became a problem. In August 2023, Choi Minhwan said he could no longer live with her, and Yulhee also admitted her mistakes.
'We've been together for five years. During that time, Yulhee ran away from home more than 20 times due to arguments. Sometimes it was for a day or two, and other times it was for a week or ten days.'
Their five-year marriage was a cycle of conflict and reconciliation. Choi Minhwan's visits to adult entertainment establishments were just one of many conflicts. (And this was not even mentioned during the divorce settlement).
However, Yulhee suddenly changed her stance. In October of last year, she exposed Choi Minhwan’s visits to adult establishments on her YouTube channel, attributing these actions as the primary reason for their divorce.
The terms of their divorce agreement took a 180-degree turn. Yulhee demanded 100 million KRW in alimony and 1 billion KRW in asset division. She also requested custody of their children until they reached adulthood.
Choi Minhwan firmly stated he could not meet Yulhee’s demands. From his perspective, Yulhee was primarily responsible for the breakdown of their marriage. Given that the divorce has already been finalized, Choi Min-hwan's stance is that he cannot fulfill these demands.
We decided to hear more from Choi Minhwan to understand his claims about the reasons behind their divorce.
① 1 August 2021: Yulhee's Runaway
On August 1, 2021, Yulhee left home. The argument started over her 'nap.' Choi Minhwan expressed his displeasure, saying, "You sleep too much." Yulhee responded, saying, "Who do you think made my life this miserable?"
Choi Minhwan and Yulhee live with his mother. The two had another argument over the nap issue. Yulhee cursed, saying things like "Crazy bastard" and "F*ck" in front of his mother. Choi Minhwan then called Yulhee's mother.
That same night, Yulhee ran away, taking their first child with her. She stayed at her parents' house for 10 days. 'Dispatch' obtained a KakaoTalk conversation between the two on August 10, which revealed the reason behind their argument.
(NB: I'll translate the full one later)
② 10 August 2021: Conversation After 9 Days
Yulhee: Who called my mom after we fought in the middle of the night? It was you who wanted me to leave.
Choi Minhwan: Who was it that said, "Who do you think made my life this miserable?"while sitting next to my mom? If you were so frustrated and wanted to play, why don't you just have fun now while you're at it.
Yulhee: I was pissed off because you called my mom after we fought in the middle of the night and told her to take me away. I admit that I was wrong for swearing in front of your mom and I should apologize for doing that.
Choi Minhwan: Why do you think I called your mom? And when did I ever treat you like a maid? Think about it. Since XX (a friend) came over, you started to sleep all the time. Is it wrong for me to be upset about that? You were yelling at me with those angry eyes, calling me 'hey' and 'you,' and I called your mom because I didn't think I could handle you anymore.
Yulhee: You were the one who yelled first. But you're right, it was wrong for me to curse and yell.
Choi Minhwan: Even when we fight, we shouldn't cross the line.
③ Choi Minhwan: "Who could tolerate this?"
Could a wife’s napping be the reason for conflict? Choi Minhwan responded with a question, “Wouldn’t it be a problem if someone slept 18–20 hours a day?”
Choi Minhwan: Yulhee sleeps abnormally, sometimes up to 18-20 hours a day. When I bring it up, she gets angry and leaves the house. She's run away more than 20 times in 5 years. Who could tolerate that?
Choi Minhwan served as a conscripted reserve (Feb. 4, 2020 – Sept. 2, 2021). During that time, Yulhee had to take care of their three children. Could her excessive napping have been a way to cope with stress?
Choi Minhwan: During my military service, we had a caregiver who took care of the kids from 9 AM to 4 PM. After work, I would look after the kids. Also, my mom helped with household chores and made dinner. I never asked Yulhee to make dinner or do the dishes.
(NB: I'll translate the full one later)
④ Text to his manager: 'I think I've reached my limit'
On 1 August 2021, the day Yulhee left the house, Choi Minhwan sent a text to his agency manager.
Choi Minhwan: We fight because she just sleeps all the time, I don’t understand. How can she sleep all day?
Manager: Maybe childcare is really hard for her. Bring her back quickly!
Choi Minhwan: I see it every day. She doesn’t even change a diaper. She doesn’t care if the kids have eaten. I’m always at home (after work). She literally just sleeps all day.
Manager: That's only been happening recently, after you were discharged.
Choi Minhwan: I go to work at 8 AM and come home at 4 PM. I put the kids down for their naps for 4 hours. But how much sleep does she need? She sleeps 18 hours a day!
(NB: I'll translate the full one later)
⑤ 28 March 2023: "Tongtong-ah, no matter how much I wake you up"
That early morning, Choi Minhwan sent a text to Yulhee: "Tongtong-ah, I’m really upset. I want to talk and spend time together with you. I know you’re tired, and if you just sleep all the time, when will we ever talk?"
Choi Minhwan explained the situation to Dispatch: "That day, Yulhee kept sleeping. Even when I tried waking her up, she wouldn’t get up. I had dinner alone and had a drink. I stayed up watching videos with the kids. That's when I left her a text, telling her to check it when she wakes up."
According to Choi Minhwan, their conflicts over sleep were a recurring issue. It was a cycle of her sleeping, him waking her up, them arguing, and her leaving. This cycle, he said, eventually led to his decision to divorce on 26 August 2023.
⑥ 25 August 2023: Running away and apology
"Yulhee left the house around August 19. She was gone for about a week. Then, on the night of the 26th, she came back, drunk. She apologized and promised, 'I won’t leave the house again.'"
There are two reasons why Choi Minhwan remembers 26 August 2023. The first is that the previous day August 25, their dog 'Lotto' passed away. Lotto was a dog they had been with for 18 years. Choi Minhwan's mother cried uncontrollably.
Coincidentally, FTISLAND's Seoul concert was held on August 26-27. The day after Lotto passed away, on the day of the concert... That evening, Yulhee returned home after a week.
Choi Minhwan: "My mother was crying to the point that she couldn’t even speak. I was busy with concert preparations, and on top of that, I had to ask her for help with the kids (three children). I felt really sorry."
(NB: I'll finish translating the rest as soon as I can)
-Are sleeping a lot and going to adult entertainment establishments the same thing??
-If she sleeps for 18-20 hours a day, the first thing you should be concerned about is her health. Are you a devil?
-Even the manager is taking Yulhee's sideㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ I was speechless reading the KakaoTalk messages. Everyone seems to think the same way... Yulhee is pitiful. Excessive sleep and lethargy are symptoms of depression, but he does this instead of worrying about her... For someone who goes to an adult entertainment establishment, he's really shameless.
-Isn’t Yulhee possibly suffering from depression...? I’m worried about her. I hope she can live the life she wants without stress. If she wants to bring the kids, she should, and if not, she should live her life the way she wants. Did none of the family members think that sleeping so much was weird? Shouldn't they have taken her to the hospital or cared for her.
-Is Dispatch stupid? Did they think people would side with this man after reading this?
-If she slept for 20 hours, isn’t that a sign of depression? They should be worried, tsk tsk.
-Sleeping for long hours is a symptom of depression and lethargyㅠㅠ
-Oh my god, sleeping that long is a major symptom of depression. She needs to see a doctor.
-If she sleeps that much, you should at least take them to the hospital...
-Did he actually reveal this himself...?
-Dispatch should just disappear. It's disgusting how they give a platform to all kinds of social evils.
-Even after reading his side of the story, I feel sorry for Yulhee...